Feb 132012

Ahhh…Valentine’s Day. The day we romantically attached folks publicly acknowledge our love for “that special someone” in our lives, and listen to single people complain about being single more than any other day of the year (except maybe Christmas). It is a day filled with hearts, chocolates, flowers, and of course that diapered winged matchmaker, Cupid. Twenty-five years ago, this iconic character was the star of a video game on the NES called Chubby Cherub. It was released in Japan a year earlier under the title Q-taro the Ghost: Bow Wow Panic. The titular character of the game was from a manga series in Japan, which Bandai apparently thought was too weird for Americans, so Chubby Cherub was born. Even though he looks like Cupid, this is a cherub of a different sort. Instead of making people love each other, he destroys small animals!


It seems that someone or something has taken the little cherub’s friends and stashed them in buildings, though I am only speculating this since the game makes no effort to relay the story line to you at all. The only things standing in our protagonist’s (or Chubster as I like to call him) way are…DOGS! They bark at Chubster and send little icons with the letter B on them flying across the screen. If you touch even one of these bark icons, then BAM – you’ve got one dead cherub on your hands. Thankfully, the people at Bandai didn’t leave the cute guy defenseless; if you eat enough junk food, you can shoot little peachy colored hearts at the mean poochies. Lollipops give you ammo for your love ray, and the rest of the nutritionally devoid food powers your flight meter. The lollipops were so few and far between, so it is essential to keep the flight meter full so you can fly around the dogs.

Show someone you love them...by killing their dog.

Though this game is very cute, the difficulty was extremely high. The dogs that barked at you often sent their icons out like a machine gun, and jumped erratically to seemingly random places which made them next to impossible to avoid. It only took one hit to send the heavenly hero to his grave and when you came back, your love beam is completely depleted of juice. The flying meter is constantly emptying while you’re aloft itself, which means that aside from dodging rapid fire barks, you need to constantly be eating food. No wonder Chubster has such a hard time keeping up with his Cupidish figure!

I was only able to make it to the end of the first stage once, and there are twelve total, so I think a good amount of cursing and frustration would be spent on this game if I decided to try to defeat it. In a nutshell, I would suggest making your own love this Valentine’s day and not relying on the help of a flying, naked, binge eater baby.

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