Nov 102008
 

1. It is incredibly cold.

2. It is very bright, and reflects the sun’s deadly radiation right back into your eyes.

3. It muffles sound, such as the sound of a serial killer selecting YOU as his next victim.

4. When on the road, it makes you wreck your car.

5. When walking on the sidewalk, it increases the likely hood that some dummy driving will run over you.

6. It increases the population of snowmen, which I hate because they remind me of myself (cold and ROUND).

7. It encourages the children in my neighborhood to throw snowballs at me (note: these children are very mean. The snowballs they craft often contain rocks, or rusty razorblades).

8. It is slippery to walk on, and I have poor balance (despite my hours doing balance exercises on Wii Fit).

9. You never know what secrets may be buried in it’s frozen depths.

10. I really hate seeing those black mountains of snow in parking lots all the way into late May. They’re gross!

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